Treating My Anxiety

I have been meaning to make this post for quite some time. I have struggled with anxiety for a long time. Before I had kids and was working, my anxiety was quite useful at times. I was very organized, on top of my work load and I remembered everything. The flip side was that my brain was going full-speed all the time. Sometimes it was hard to sleep and sometimes I would get really restless with the monotony of life.

Once I had kids and was home more and working less, the anxiety became solely a burden. I would get stir-crazy really easily. I would get restless and anxious when I was alone with kid/kids. It was hard! I thought something was wrong with me so I mentioned it to my OB-GYN (since I don't have any kind of general doctor because I never go to the doctor other than for pregnancy). I was put on anti-depressants. They helped, sort of. They took the edge off a little bit but I still felt pretty anxious. It wasn't crippling so I never sought help from a psychiatrist or therapist.

Fast forward to when my third baby was about 9 months old. I was with my hairdresser and loooooong time friend, Stephanie. I was telling her about my struggles with losing the baby weight. I had done everything that I could do to lose weight, short of starving myself. Crazy exercise and dieting and the weight would hardly budge. I knew it had to be hormonal of some sort. Stephanie referred me to a hormone doctor that she knew of called Balanced Body MD (in Draper, UT).

And just a side note, the office itself is a little bit unprofessional. I think they are still trying to get their bearings. I had an appointment for a blood draw and dragged all 3 of my kids down there and after I got there and after having waited for 10 minutes, the girl who was supposed to draw my blood called and said she was going to be 30 minutes late... I couldn't wait in their little waiting room with 3 kids. Didn't she know she had an appointment at 10 am? And didn't she know earlier than after 10 am that she was going to be at least 30 minutes late? Maybe something crazy happened to her that morning, I don't really know. I had to reschedule. BUT they do sell Isagenix products and Quest bars there and I love both of those brands.

I went to my appointment and they took 7 vials of blood to test all of my hormone levels. My thyroid was low and my testosterone was low, among some other things. They wanted to insert a testosterone pellet into my butt cheek. I almost turned it down because it was such unfamiliar territory for me. They told me it would help with anxiety, exercise recovery and low libido (aka sex drive), among a few other things. I went with it and got the pellet inserted into my butt cheek through a small incision. 

Have you ever had a shot in your butt cheek? It HURTS! I remember thinking that this better be worth it.

Within a couple days, I felt like a new person. And not because I was losing weight rapidly (which I wasn't) but because the anxiety was completely GONE! I felt so content and without stress. Suddenly, I was content just staying home and playing with my kids (versus being home with kids and constantly being anxious about what was going on in the world around me). I was less restless, I was sleeping better and I just felt so great. I quit taking my anti-depressants within two days and have never looked back. And the sex drive, oohhhh the sex drive. Without saying anything more, the sex drive....

An added bonus is that I was finally able to lose 10 pounds and I feel so much better now about  my weight (who knew that 10 pesky pounds could make such a difference).

The pellet was $288 and lasts 3-4 months. Unfortunately, insurance doesn't cover it because it is considered alternative. Insurance is more than happy to cover the anti-depressants which were more expensive and less effective, though. Hopefully that will change someday. But for now, I will gladly pay $288 every 3-4 months in order to feel as good as I feel. Our quality of life has increased substantially. I love it!

There are a couple of down sides to the pellet, which the doctor did warn me about. The main one is acne, which I have been getting on the back of my neck. It is weird but I am happy I am not getting acne on my face! I am still learning to control it because I have never struggled with acne in my life.

I also sweat more now and I am more forgetful. SO much more forgetful because I am no longer anxious and so I am not constantly replaying my schedule and commitments in my head. If you ever make plans with me, you should probably remind me that same day. :) It will just take me some time to get organized now that my high-strung brain isn't doing it all for me.

If you can relate to any of this, maybe you should get your hormones checked, too. It has helped me tremendously! And who knew that anxiety could be caused by a testosterone deficiency?!? THIS has changed my life. I am so thankful to my friend for suggesting that I get my hormones checked!

Selling a House With Small Kids

Today was the first day that our house was listed for sale. There is good news, we got a showing already! The bad news is that the house was messy (because we had the carpets cleaned this morning and furniture had not been put back) and I received word of the showing while I was at the dentist with kids and had 15 minutes to get home and clean the snot out of the house.

I left the kids in the car, the baby crying, and ran inside frantically trying to hide the dirty dishes (threw them in a garbage sack and hid it in the dog house), make the beds, hide the dirty laundry baskets, stuff things under the beds, etc... I am not going to be able to find anything now! It took me 10 minutes to find where I had stuffed the charger to my laptop.

I only cursed like 25 times... I was sweating like a pig.

We had to be gone for one hour and it was in the middle of my baby's nap time. Thankfully she passed out in the car. I didn't think we would get a response so quickly, which is good news, but I am completely unprepared for when we have to bolt for a showing.

That is all, I just really wanted to share how crazy it was for one single showing...

Motherhood Guilt Be Gone!

My 6 year old boy, E, loves TV. He always has. He began watching Barney when he was just barely a year old. It evolved to Sesame Street and many of the other PBS shows like SuperWhy and Sid the Science Kid. I felt like everything that I would read online about kids watching TV was negative. It was bad for them, it would lead to obesity and possibly ADHD in the future. I had a constant struggle because E just wasn't interested in much else. I would try and limit his TV but I always let him watch more than what was recommended. He liked watching TV, learning about ABCs, numbers, etc... And I didn't want to force him to play with toys. After all, he has never been a "toy kid".

Fast forward to now.

E is so intelligent. He was writing when he was 2. He was reading when he was 3. Now that he is 6, he can do math in his head and read books that should be way beyond his age. He thrives in school. At his pediatrician appointment today, the doctor told me that he can tell that E does well in school just by spending 5 minutes examining him.

I think back on all of the time and energy that I spent feeling guilty about letting him watch TV. So far in his life, it has turned out to be an enormous benefit. Now I find myself trying to get my 3 year old, who is very artistic and creative, interested in watching TV on PBS. She is not. She asks for it, watches a few minutes at best and then wanders off to play. This is good, too. But I do worry with how well she will do in school because she could not be less interested in her letters and numbers. She enjoys having books read to her so that is what we do now.

The moral of the story is that every child is different. They come with different interests and different ways of learning. And that motherhood guilt is rarely productive. Children will never go without challenges and struggles. And as mothers, I think we only have so much influence and control. Our children will not be perfect, no matter what. But ew, who likes perfect people anyway?!

Love Grows Best In Little Houses Print - 8x10, 11x14 and 16x20

I grew up in big houses. My dad was (and still is) a successful doctor and so even though we were a family of 8, most of us still had our own bedrooms and there was plenty of space to play. I remember my mom complaining that we would disappear into the basement and she couldn't hear us or know what we were up to. When my parents sold their home in the suburbs of Chicago, we had to live in an apartment for awhile. And I have such fond memories of living in that little apartment! My home is small. And we enjoy it. And I can hear my kids no matter where they go inside of it. My kids share bedrooms and they love it. I am sure many of you are like me and will also love this adorable little poem. Enjoy!

Available in 8x10, 11x14 and 16x20!

Click HERE to download the above print.

(The prints are in the compressed folder together, rather than posting each size separately)

Why I Don't Sell My Prints...

I have been asked (a lot) why I don't sell these prints to try and make some extra cash. As much as I would love to have extra green laying around, every time that I try to make a hobby into a job, it becomes just that, a JOB. It isn't fun anymore and I do it all out of obligation, not because I want to. I want to protect my art soul by keeping my art to a hobby. I like for it to be fun. And I look forward to making art. I get really excited when I come up with a new idea and I can't wait until the kids are in bed and I can work on it! It wouldn't be that way if I was doing it as a job. Plus, if I want to, I can quit any time. I like that freedom! :) So I will keep doing this as long as it is fun for me and once I stop enjoying it, maybe I will quit. Or switch to something else. In the mean time, I really hope that you enjoy what I am doing!

The BEST Whole-Wheat Waffles Recipe

I have to share this recipe because it has been such a hit at my house! My husband, all 3 kids and I all LOVE these waffles. The waffles are from 100 Days of Real Food, are whole-wheat and there is no sugar, just sweetened with honey. I eat them plain because they have that health-full flavor. Instead of sacrificing health, convenience or money for the ready-made healthy kind, I just make a double batch of these and freeze the rest. I put them in the toaster just like I would with and Eggo. I am in love!

Click HERE to see the recipe! Enjoy!

I Heart Utah Prints

I made a plaque resembling this the other day and made a little brag post to my friends on Facebook. I got a lot of response about this so I thought I would just make it into a digital print that people can download and hang in their homes. I made this print in 8x10, 11x14 11.75x15.75 (the size of the IKEA frames) and 16x20. The download is to a ZIP file where you will find the brown ones in each size and the gray ones in each size.

Since MOST of my friends are here in Utah, I just made it for Utah. I would be quite the task to move that little heart to every state in the US. BUT, if you would like for me to make one for another state (or another country!), let me know via comment and I will try to get that done for you! Enjoy!

To download the I Heart Utah prints, click HERE.

And remember, these prints are for personal use only!!

Free Font - Janda Stylish Script

This is one of my favorite fonts to use and I thought I would share it here since it is free!

You can download Janda Stylish Script by clicking HERE (you will be taken to dafont.com). Enjoy!

Free Digital Scrapbooking Kit From Shabby Princess

I love Shabby Princess and used a lot of their downloads to get started with digital scrapbooking. How cute is this kit??

And it's free! Click HERE to be redirected to download it. Enjoy!

Recovering From a C-Section

I have had 3 C-sections now and so I consider myself quite experienced. Although I did ask my OBGYN how many C-sections a woman can have, he told me that it is case-by-case and that he had just performed a woman's SIXTH C-section! Amazing. Here is a little bit of my story with my first C-section, the Reader's Digest version.

I have a family history of BIG babies. My husband does, too. 7 pound babies? HA! I had my last baby 2 1/2 weeks early and SHE was 7 pounds. At 39 weeks with my first baby, I was ginormous and not even dilated to 1 cm. My OBGYN knew my family history (big heads) and scheduled an ultrasound to measure my baby boy's head. When we did the ultrasound, the technician giggled because sure enough, my baby had a huge head just like all the boys in the family before him. My doctor recommended a C-section, I trusted him and his expertise and so we went with it.

My second C-section was because I was dying (not really but it felt like it) and wanted to get the baby the $!*@$#%! out. And the hospitals in Utah make it rather difficult to have a VBAC these days.

Third C-section was because I had to. Unless I wanted to have the baby at home. No, thank you (no offense to those who are in to that). My third C-section was my easiest and I think it was because I had learned what helps to recover, what doesn't help and what to avoid (like SNEEZING AND COUGHING).

Here are the things that I learned:

1: Get up and get moving. WHAT????!?!! Yes, that is right! Within 24 hours of my first baby being born, the nurses took out my catheter and wanted me to get up and walk. I thought they were nuts. Didn't I need to stay in bed for like a month?! Wouldn't I just split right open and what if my guts spilled out? I resisted with my first birth. I didn't want to. And guess what? Harder recovery. The reason the nurses want you to get out of bed is because it speeds up the recovery. After my third, I bounced (very gingerly) out of bed as soon as they would let me. I walked around a lot. I pushed myself more (partly because I was confident my guts were not going to spill out). I would walk around (like a 120 year old woman) and push my baby in her bassinet and sometimes it sucked but it really helped.

2. You will be able to pee again, I promise, just be patient. It took me several tries to finally be able to pee after having the surgery. I could tell my bladder was so full and finally, I just had to sit there for over an hour and I was able to succeed. Who knew I could be so excited to pee? It was like potty training all over again where I threw myself a little par-tay.

3. Don't eat too much too soon after the surgery. I made this mistake after my third baby. I was sooooo hungry. I finally convinced the nurses to let me eat, they did, I ate, I felt fine, then all of the sudden.... my mom was having a great time holding my barf pan. Bless her.

4. Sleep. You will need it and want it. Thankfully, the painkillers help with that. Sleep when you have down time without visitors.

5. BE AWARE if you begin to get pains in your shoulder or back. Pains that feel like they need a massage. This is my least favorite part about a C-section. It is GAS. Your body wants to pass gas and your intestines are all jumbled and confused, so somehow the gas goes to different parts of your body. That is the dummy explanation because I don't even know how this is possible but it happens, sort of like that anyway. And it can be really uncomfortable. The nurses can give you simethicone to help. With my third baby, I asked for it right off the bat.

6. It is ok if you need to cry your face off for awhile. The nurses understand. They're not judging. No need to apologize.

7. After you get home, your biggest challenge will be getting up from the laying down position. At least this is how it was for me. When the baby would wake up in the night and I needed to sit up so I could get him/her, it would hurt like a mother. And it was hard. Instead of trying to sit up, roll over on your side first, then try rolling out of bed slowly, then stand up slowly. Less abs needed.

8. Use your husband/boyfriend/partner/friend. They want to help. They are there to help. Sometimes, we need to just let them help.

9. IF you are unlucky enough to have the natural need to sneeze or cough that entire first week or two, oh-em-gee, sit up, take a pillow, put it over your incision and press down as you sneeze/cough. And then cry if you need, but the pillow should help. I didn't do this after my second baby and I split my incision open a little bit. Nothing major but still, no fun at all!

10. There is always the risk of an infection after a C-section. I contracted an infection in my uterus during my second C-section. It didn't show it's ugly face for at least a week, but when it did, it put me to tears. My uterus began contracting every 30-60 seconds, I couldn't sit up, I felt like I was dying. I didn't know what was wrong and I was really freaked out. My husband took me to my OBGYN and he knew right away what it was. He could feel my uterus through my stomach and it was swollen and VERY tender. He prescribed antibiotics and it went right away. Phew!

Medical advances are amazing. My mom has repeatedly said that if we were living just 100 years ago, I would have likely not survived the birth of my first baby. And my sister would have not survived the birth of her boy (big head, never fails). I am thankful to have had the option of a planned C-section. If you find yourself in a situation similar to mine, it can be scary, but you are definitely not alone. Hang in there and be positive. You will feel like yourself again someday, believe it or not. Good luck!!

The World Cup VS The Stanley Cup

The World Cup...

Whaaaaa! OMG I think I am DEAD!! Whaaa!!!

OMG!!! His foot touched mine!!! WHAAAAAA!!!

Seriously, your leg better be broken....

vs The Stanley Cup...

Hockey players are real men. With fake teeth.

You get my point, I need to say nothing more except buck up soccer!!!!

Home Decor With Sharpe Permanent Markers

I absolutely love to make my own home decor. I can make it exactly how I want it and it is cheap. And fun! I had this large yellow painting that I had done but it was pretty plain. I liked it for the pop of color that it added to the corner of my living room but I wanted to add a little more character to it. Enter Pinterest...

I printed off letters that I made in Microsoft Word. I cut them out and traced them using a pencil onto the yellow painting. Then I just colored it in with the Sharpe permanent markers! It was really that simple. It was fun and now I have a painting with this cute quote on it. :) Good luck!

Patriotic Prints

I LOVE SUMMER.

I can't say it enough!! And my favorite holiday is the FOURTH OF JULY, naturally. I love the food, the BBQ, the weather, the fireworks and it isn't stressful and demanding like Thanksgiving and Christmas can be. The Fourth of July is a time to relax and play with family and friends. I love, love, love it! I made these prints in honor of my most favorite holiday. I also went out on a HUGE limb here and made them in 8x10 or 11x14! Watch out, I am crazy! :) Enjoy!

To download the above print in 8x10, click

HERE.

To download the above print in 11x14, click

HERE.

To download the above print in 8x10, click

HERE.

To download the above print in 11x14, click

HERE.

To download the above print in 8x10, click

HERE.

To download the above print in 11x14, click

HERE.

All printables offered above are free for personal non-commercial use only.

In This Home

I love this reminder quote. Enjoy!

To download the above print, click

HERE.

To download the above print, click

HERE.

To download the above print, click

HERE.

All printables offered above are free for personal non-commercial use only.

Families Are Forever

I believe this! Enjoy!

To download the above print, click

HERE.

To download the above print, click

HERE.

To download the above print, click

HERE.

To download the above print, click

HERE.

All printables offered above are free for personal non-commercial use only.

Never Let A Problem

One of my favorite quotes from Thomas S. Monson. What a wonderful reminder. Enjoy!

To download the above print, click

HERE.

All printables offered above are free for personal non-commercial use only.

If You Think Good Thoughts Version 2

I love this quote so much that I made another one. :) One pink, one purple. Enjoy!

To download the above print, click

HERE.

To download the above print, click

HERE.

All printables offered above are free for personal non-commercial use only.